Back to work I go, back to work I go– It’s been an interesting sort of week or two 0r more since I’ve gone back to work and honestly? I’m working a shit lot of overtime due to a very inconsiderate person randomly going on leave–I normally wouldn’t be upset about overtime or whatnot, but the fact that it was announced out of the blue without any preparation is just…had everyone scrambling to fix and fill in her shifts which is exasperating on me since I now close from 3 to 11 every Monday and Wednesday and sometimes open a few days a week. I think if she planned it better instead of saying it was happening a few days before she left on leave, I wouldn’t be upset so much. So fatigued with it. I at least planned ahead and let them know when and how my leave of absence was happening, but I can guess it was either an emergency or not. I hope to god it was an emergency because I’m tired of working overtime. I got 42 hours last week and this week- 41 or possibly more depending on how much they need me, which is a lot. I dropped from 16.50 an hour to 16 an hour. To be fair, I should be making more than that…but that’s the US for you with stagnant wages and higher costs of living, health care and whatnot.
To top it all off with work: I still have to pay back the IRS nearly 3000 USD and somehow, I’m not getting the same pay or the fact that they didn’t take out enough despite me doing my taxes right and somehow, now having to file single or head of household which is ridiculous because I’m married and never had a hard time filing married jointly. So it’s really someone’s fault and somehow we’ll be on the hook for half of it because my aunt is helping but I’m going to pressure or at least persuade my husband to ask his parents for help because honestly? We don’t have that money and are paying off my dental work for crowns which I needed and my dental insurance denied coverage for. They’re fucking useless, so why am I paying for them? I’ll be paying them off until 2027, unfortunately and that always makes us broke around that time at the start of the month and it’s taxing on my husband. Luckily, we don’t spend money on food much and luckily I barely eat as it is–thanks to the Wegovy 2.4 mg I’m on and the fact that I have a smaller stomach thanks to bariatric surgery aka gastric sleeve. To be fair, I never enjoyed food much only to consume it and I’m hella picky to boot. Either way, we need help with the IRS and tonight, I’ll have a talk because I can and because we need all the help we can get and my aunt is doing all she can paying half. It’s a nightmare still, honestly and I hate it!
Still, making my way through therapy and it’s working! Thank god!~ Thank god! Finally, I understand a lot of things going in therapy and even one therapy session had me empathizing with my abuser aka my mother, my birth mother but boundaries are to be put up still to protect myself as self care but it was difficult and made me a bit sick, though I’ll feel better later. In the end, abuse is what ultimately drives children not to talk to their parents namely my mother though I will say that my dad is another story on it; he’s been great and not all the terrible person that my mother made him out to be. I’m sort of sick, too with a beginning sinus infection and my atopic dermatitis is trying to come back which they told me it would, so to keep taking the ointment and it will help push it back off my skin. It’s funny how these things happen but I can be assured that I’m busting my butt to help out my husband and curb my expenses. Not easy. Not that I make a lot of money, anyhow. Had my best friend come and visit from Seattle which was fantastic!
Not to mention knowing terrible secrets about coworkers and their personal lives that could put me into danger and whatnot but at the end, I dunno how things will play out for them, which I hope only gets better with them. It’s the sort of secrets that can kill someone or at the very least get someone killed. I hope they don’t become a statistic, honestly and I wish I could help them out of their situation but I cannot, unfortunately. I lost another lb or two– down to 109-108 or at least teetering on that aspect and I hate it. I didn’t want to lose anymore weight but I haven’t been eating enough calories and it shows. I may be thin and pink, but never beautiful.
