I go back to work in less than one week and honestly? I’m ready for it. I’m ready to go back to work and be productive again and be around familiar faces plus, I’ll be back in my old position of Service Supervisor which is fantastic by the way because my previous entry was about me not fitting into my new position and asking to step down from it. I don’t know if it was the right or wrong call but I had to do what was right for me in that moment and I know maybe I jumped the gun but the fact I was in that position for a month or two…I think I judged myself well in knowing what I was good at and not. I think that’s a good enough way to judge if I’m perfect for the position or not despite my depression raging in the background and me taking all of May off to get TMS done.
(more…)

Welcome to the second layout of Dreaming Arcadia, thanks to Karen of Snow Drops and yeah, I’m still alive and wasting away…just kidding, right? Anyhow, this month has been fraught with a lot of changes and by big changes really meaning that I’m off work for a month awaiting short term disability to pay me and whatnot. And getting it approved throughout the system but in the end, I’m working on improving myself and slowly, reaching back out to myself though I fear I’ll never get back the person I was before mental illness took over in my early to late twenties. Bipolar Disorder is one hell of a mental illness along with BPD aka Borderline Personality Disorder. It robbed me of the potential that my life held for me and with my various procedures with getting my gallbladder taken out, my weight loss surgery and one I was considering because of gynecological issues…which I didn’t have done, because that’s a whole host of other issues like entering menopause and taking fake hormones and whatnot. OH well.

(more…)